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I ??
Alas, it’s not uncommon,
to see African governments,

shut down the internet;

Ethiopia’s scared of exam cheating,

so the economy will take a beating,
how supreme, their intellect (?);
···

II ??
Kenya’s new rail system,
is a joy to behold,
it makes Nigeria look like a farce;

But here is Mark Essien,
well, the project he proposed:
pothole detection for self-driving cars;
···

III ? 
“Aha!” said Jumia Market,
they thought it would be brilliant,
to be “Instagram of e-commerce”;

“Uh, uhn” I beg to differ (??),
are there no more arrows in your quiver,
than these silly monikers?;

Instagram be Instagram (?),
Kaymu be Jumia Market,
all this copying, I’m not sure who’s less inventive;
(hint: ?)

But Instagram be INSTAGRAM,
they link more buyers to more trad’rs,
all without taking a percentage (now, that’s incentive!);
···

IV ?? 
I’m tired and sick,
of Uber for shit,
I have been since the days of yore;

Yet, here is Beaconworx,
to empower freelance pilots,
to “fly planes like never before” (?);
···

V ??
Mark Essien: “raise too much money,
to capture a market that’s not ready,
and you’ll be dead 24 months later“;

Meanwhile, Nigerian internet operators,
doth lobby the industry regulator:
they would love to raise the price of data;
···

VI ? 
I’m feeling rather vain,
on this fine Thursday,
if I didn’t, I would call me bonkers;

That’s a fancy way to say,
there’s a picture of me,
after the message from our sponsors ??


Afrobytes is an annual international Tech Conference connecting businesses and technology leaders, founders, investors, and policy experts with the fastest-growing African tech startups. The inaugural conference will take place in Paris on June 8-9, 2017, at Le Medef. Find out more and register here.


Bonus stuff, because I love you
+ Mary Meeker’s 2017 Internet Trends Report, AKA the Bible.
?? 
+ This is what happens when you overfeed your protocols. Link. ??
+ Rickrolling is sexist, racist, and often transphobic in context. Link. ?
+ Shut up. No one is going to fund your hyperlocal, AI-powered, Sardine-as-a-service e-commerce startup. Link. ?
+ Culture at Big Cabal. Link. (I can neither confirm nor deny that there’s a chocolate fountain in the office). ?

+ The cause of time. Link. ⌛️

More From TC
No Electricity For Emergency Laparotomy; Solar Energy Is Helping A Nigerian Hospital Save Lives
people, startups
September 21, 2018

Nigerian businesses including hospitals critically need power to survive and for some, to save lives. Renewable energy (especially off-grid) presents a strong proposition to address the power challenges.

Postpartum Haemorrhage: Africa Urgently Needs To Invest More In Healthcare Logistics
Funding, people, startups
September 21, 2018

The top 20 countries in the world with the highest maternal mortality rates are in Africa making PPH as a factor in maternal mortality is a very serious problem that requires urgent attention.

Opinion: Why Nigeria’s Tech Ecosystem Shouldn’t Be Built Exclusively With Foreign Capital
Funding, people, startups
September 21, 2018

El Dorado will be a tech ecosystem built by international and local investors in a sustainable manner creating win-win scenario for all parties alike.

HydroPower Dominates Africa’s Renewables But Over 80% Of Its Potential Remains Untapped
people, startups
September 20, 2018

Africa has a potential to have installed energy capacity of about 350,000 MW (350 GW) from hydropower alone but only about 10 – 20% has been installed.


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