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I ??
Alas, it’s not uncommon,
to see African governments,
shut down the internet;

Ethiopia’s scared of exam cheating,
so the economy will take a beating,
how supreme, their intellect (?);
···

II ??
Kenya’s new rail system,
is a joy to behold,
it makes Nigeria look like a farce;

But here is Mark Essien,
well, the project he proposed:
pothole detection for self-driving cars;
···

III ? 
“Aha!” said Jumia Market,
they thought it would be brilliant,
to be “Instagram of e-commerce”;

“Uh, uhn” I beg to differ (??),
are there no more arrows in your quiver,
than these silly monikers?;

Instagram be Instagram (?),
Kaymu be Jumia Market,
all this copying, I’m not sure who’s less inventive;
(hint: ?)

But Instagram be INSTAGRAM,
they link more buyers to more trad’rs,
all without taking a percentage (now, that’s incentive!);
···

IV ?? 
I’m tired and sick,
of Uber for shit,
I have been since the days of yore;

Yet, here is Beaconworx,
to empower freelance pilots,
to “fly planes like never before” (?);
···

V ??
Mark Essien: “raise too much money,
to capture a market that’s not ready,
and you’ll be dead 24 months later“;

Meanwhile, Nigerian internet operators,
doth lobby the industry regulator:
they would love to raise the price of data;
···

VI ? 
I’m feeling rather vain,
on this fine Thursday,
if I didn’t, I would call me bonkers;

That’s a fancy way to say,
there’s a picture of me,
after the message from our sponsors ??


Afrobytes is an annual international Tech Conference connecting businesses and technology leaders, founders, investors, and policy experts with the fastest-growing African tech startups. The inaugural conference will take place in Paris on June 8-9, 2017, at Le Medef. Find out more and register here.


Bonus stuff, because I love you
+ Mary Meeker’s 2017 Internet Trends Report, AKA the Bible.
?? 
+ This is what happens when you overfeed your protocols. Link. ??
+ Rickrolling is sexist, racist, and often transphobic in context. Link. ?
+ Shut up. No one is going to fund your hyperlocal, AI-powered, Sardine-as-a-service e-commerce startup. Link. ?
+ Culture at Big Cabal. Link. (I can neither confirm nor deny that there’s a chocolate fountain in the office). ?
+ The cause of time. Link. ⌛️

Osarumen Osamuyi Author

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